everyone thinks` m a raincloud (when i ain't looking)

I am the king of dreaming in a wishful way when I am wide awake. Maybe it's true and I'm just a fool but there comes a time and I see that what I'm needing is a feeling to believe in .It's an unknown state in the place I cant find, and I have kinda lost my way but I keep the faith with an open mind. Someday I will find a love that runs deep through me and everything will flow. I feel better when I hear them say, everything will be wonderful someday. I like to laugh so my friends won't know. I can smile with all these tears in my eyes. I tell the kids that it is all okay .I think thoughts that I know are bad but I close my eyes when I am too sad. Then I count to ten and hope it's over when I open them. I make believe that I have a new life and I dream adventures that would make me smile.
Yet my world is on fire, everything I touch fall to bits. I'm waste deep in the burning meadows of my mind. I have been in the engine in cold December, shooting fire from the hose. I thought I could fit in, blend in all the mess where nothing is hard, nothing is precious, and nothing is smooth or flawless. But I am no longer amused. I want the things that I had before, like a Star wars picture in my bedroom door. I wish I could count to ten and make everything alright. But that is the way I like it and I am never bored. Beauty has got a live Me, and. though I aint the sharpest tool in the shed, just a nicotine junkie singing for a kodacam but it feel so good being cheap. I watch the skies for the mystical machine gunfire, and that is the riddle of my life.
In the age of the chimpanzees, I was a monkey. I was half a human and I looked for wars' solution. I was a hundred miles in the ocean, I didn't show no emotion. But now, the cold hearted boy I used to be is changing; still I am learning the things I ought to know by now. It's under the table, so I need something more to show, somehow!
Still, I am happy, I am feeling glad. I have got sunshine in a bag, in my back. I am useless, but not for long; my future is coming on. It's coming on, it's coming up roses! I'm in the sky tonight, I am breaking through, I am bending spoons, I am keeping flowers in full bloom, I m looking for answers from the great beyond. I'm on my way.